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What mental habits should you develop for creating a strong mind?
- A mind that is bulletproof.
- A mind immune to pressure, failure and that can deal with any challenge.
- A mind that will take you to new levels in life.
“A strong mind is one of the key components that separates the great from the good.”
– Gary Player
In this article, I will teach you 3 Powerful Mental Habits to help you:
- become more confident
- quickly recover from failure and setbacks
- turn into a mentally strong and powerful person
Let’s get started!
A Mentally Strong Person
In her book “13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do”, author and psychotherapist Amy Morin introduces 13 destructive mental habits that will weaken your mind, make you more vulnerable to external factors, and stop you from achieving your goals.
With bad mental habits, your life becomes a lot harder to live.
Morin specifically describes 3 bad mental habits that lay the foundation for all the other 10.
Learn how to correct these and you’ll have the fundamental tools to create a strong mind.
With a strong mind, you become a strong person.
And to truly feel strong in your life, and to feel gratitude for the things you have, you have to get into the mindset which Tony Robbins often preach:
“Life is happening for you, not to you”
A strong mind is a sure way to make this mindset your reality. And these 3 mental habits are a sure way to get there!
So what are these mental habits?
Without further ado, here they are!
#1 Mental Habit: “The world doesn’t owe you anything”
“No matter whether you’re the smartest person on the planet or you’ve persevered through life’s roughest circumstances, you don’t become more deserving of good fortune than anyone else.”
– Amy Morin
You might lose your job, fail your start-up, or get dumped by your boy- or girlfriend.
If you frame these setbacks as something you don’t deserve because you’re a good person, worked so hard, or that it’s simply not fair, you will only invite more anger and frustration into your life.
The world doesn’t owe you anything instead, shift your focus to helping other people like, your friends, family, co-workers, or strangers.
By focusing on helping, contributing, and sharing with others you can steer your mind away from the illusion that the world owes you something.
Holding the door open for someone else, or offering your study partners a cup of coffee are some of the simplest acts you can do.
The mental habit that the world doesn’t owe you anything HELPS YOU STOP:
- frame other people’s success as a failure for you
- waste your time feeling sorry for yourself
- play the blame-game when things don’t go your way
#2 Mental Habit: “Focus on the things you can control”
Things we can’t control take up mental space and create reasons to complain which gets you into a negative state of being.
Things like the bad weather, a traffic jam, or why your crush is not responding to your texts…
The bad habit of complaining is something we explore further in our article “13 Bad Morning Habits and What To Do Instead!”
If there is nothing you can do about it, stop complaining and focus on the things you can control!
How to focus on the things you can control
Amy Morin gives the following advice from her book:
When your life feels out of control, take out a piece of paper and draw a line through the middle.
In the top, write “What I can’t control:”, at the bottom “What I can control:”
What you can’t fully control includes for example;
- things in the past
- things in the future
- other people
- your thoughts
- your emotions
What you CAN control is;
- how you respond to situations
- what you focus on
- how you choose to change your circumstances
- what meaning you put into things
- how you frame yourself
- how you behave
Once you’ve written down all the things you can and can’t control, Morin suggests you rip off the top part of the paper (with the things you can’t control), tear it apart into small pieces until it’s trash.
You’re then left with the things you can control in your life, and that’s where your focus should be.
The mental habit of focusing on the things you can control HELPS YOU STOP:
- dwelling on the past
- letting other people’s opinions dictate your life
- trying to please everyone around you
By focusing on the things you can control, you make sure to put energy on things that create real change in your life.
#3 Mental Habit: “Learn from your mistakes”
“Mentally strong people don’t metaphorically dust themselves off and get right back on their horse. They pause to figure out why they fell off in the first place before getting back on.”
– Amy Morin
“When you make a mistake, there are only three things you should ever do about it: admit it, learn from it, and don’t repeat it.”
– Paul Bear Bryant
“More people would learn from their mistakes if they weren’t so busy denying them.”
– Harold J. Smith
All these quotes sound great, but how do you learn from your mistakes?
It may be a silly question, but it’s easier said than done, especially if you think you’re doing the right thing or feel resistant to try something new.
Amy Morin gives the following advice from her book:
1. Try to imagine that the mistake you’ve made was made by someone else
Ask yourself:
How would I help a friend learn about a mistake they’ve made?
You would probably be more objective towards the mistake and more clearly identify what factors led to the mistakes, like: thoughts, behaviors, and external circumstances.
And if it were your friend making the mistake, you would probably not give them such a hard time about it.
Don’t beat yourself up if you make a mistake, learn from it, and move on.
2. Create a new action when the factors appear
Once you’ve identified the factors, write down what new action your friend should take next time these thoughts, behaviors, and external circumstances appear.
3. Write a list of reasons against the mistake
After you created a new action, write a list of reasons why you don’t want to make this same mistake in the future.
“Carry this list with you. When you’re tempted to resort to your previous behavior pattern, read this list to yourself. It can increase your motivation to resist repeating old patterns. For example, create a list of reasons why you should go for a walk after dinner. When you’re tempted to watch TV instead of exercise, read the list and it may increase your motivation to move forward.”
– Amy Morin
The mental habit of learning from your mistakes HELPS YOU STOP:
- shying away from change
- giving up after the first failure
- expecting immediate results
- fearing alone time, because this is probably the best time to reflect upon your mistakes, learn from them, and improve your life.
Summary
To summarize the mental habits for creating a strong mind:
- The world doesn’t owe you anything
- Focus on the things you can control
- Learn from your mistakes
Practice these, and you’ll make sure to:
- become more confident
- quickly recover from failure and setbacks
- turn into a mentally strong and powerful person
And lastly…
Thanks to ProductivityGame for the inspiration.
And thank YOU for making it until the end.
This article has been full of nice quotes, so why not end with one more from a very quotable person:
“The mind is everything. What you think you become.”
– Buddha
Until next time,
André
André
Latest posts by André (see all)
- #32 How to Turn Your Weaknesses into Strengths (ft. Niklas Carlson) - 1st April 2021
- #31 Psychology of Marketing, Productivity and Finding Mentors (ft Oskar Söderlund) - 19th March 2021
- #29 Mental Habits to Develop a Strong Mind (Part 2) - 24th February 2021
